positive affirmations for the future

In my last post I talked about letting go of attachment to school, constructed meanings of success and "purpose". I would plan my grad party then open another tab to search up trips I can take in 2020. Then deleted all those tabs because I what I'm dealing with can't be fixed with a plane ticket. And I'm very aware of that.

Fear is breathing down my neck and anxiety makes me up in the morning. And God knows I'm constantly nauseous and scared.

I am dealing with losing a loved one on top of drowning in university requirements and trying to grip to some sort of normalcy. I'm letting go of limiting beliefs and things that inhibit me from dealing with loss and dealing with my underlining insecurity that comes with post-secondary studies and figuring out who I am, what I want and where I'm going. Please believe me when I tell you I'm trying as best as I can to answer these questions with love, curiosity and positive energy. Approach it as someone who has faith in the direction of their life and isn't stressed or worried because they truly believe to the core of their being that they are well taken care of.

I wrote down a couple affirmations to "convince" myself of those beliefs;

I am so excited for the future before me

Everything I need to succeed is in me

I am supported and loved

I am worthy of everything I desire

I am a brilliant being

I trust the timing of my life

I am able to create the life of my dreams

Everything is unfolding according to plan

I am fully capable

I am able to balance all my responsibilities and be happy

I am not alone

Good things are coming to me

I am thankful for everything that is to come

I receive great opportunities with ease

Money and opportunities find their way to me with ease

I do all things with grace and peace

I am in a constant state of calm

The grace of God is constantly shining on me

I am full of brilliant ideas

I am innovative (I am an innovator)

I am creative (I am a creator)

I am surrounded by change makers

I am supported by those who love me (this can also include resources, a counselor/therapist, an online community etc.)

I am a leader of my generation

I am an impactful voice of my generation

I am constantly learning and gaining knowledge

I truly and deeply believe in my abilities

I am attracting positive loving people in my life

I am open

I am safe, I am present, I am grounded

I forgive myself

I would love to travel post-grad before completing my master's but I know that the attempt at peace would be futile if I don't deal with my limiting beliefs, grief and shortcomings. Looking through my travel pinterest board I'm aware that I can never take a trip like that without feeling and looking as calm as these women. I would think about school or work or feel guilty that I spend money on a trip to treat myself unless it was to see my grandparents. (Sidenote: Africa to see my grandparents is also on my 2020 travel list). I know that I can't go off and travel till I deal with these feelings because I wouldn't won't allow me to enjoy it. After the year I've had I neeed an eat, pray, love moment but I can't even start to do that with all this baggage. I justwant to travel and make decisions to travel from a happy and light place